Just a few hours ago Jess's memorial service in California came to an end. It has been two weeks today since she entered the gates of His kingdom. I know that many people have been praying over these past few weeks... I have sensed those prayers, I have been strengthened and renewed by them, and I have been able to get thru these days because of them. The emails, cards and comments have meant the world to me. Thank you, I feel so blessed to have you as a part of my life.
Losing someone at such a young age brings so many varied feelings no matter what the circumstances are. The truth is that it's 14 days later and I don't understand it any better than when I was standing at her bedside, removing her wedding ring for Matt, and brushing her hair off of her beautiful forehead. I won't understand it any better in a few weeks when we receive the results from the medical examiners office. The findings will really mean nothing to me, bottom line is that she is gone from this earth. The Lord was the only one who knew her fate all along.
He allows us to all grieve in numerous patterns and time frames. While yes, I am sad she is gone, I miss her deeply, and think of her constantly BUT I am at peace with her going to be with our God. Of course, the only way to know that peace is to know Him. Nothing I say can make you believe in His love the way He desires you to.
Tonight, tomorrow and throughout the coming months, without fail I will continue to trust in Him to heal myself and the rest of the people that loved Jessica so much.
2 years ago